We Will Never Ever Be Friends After A Breakup

 

Boyfriends bring several things to the table: emotional, mental and physical connections.

Friends don’t. Friends only bring emotional and/or mental connections. So they’ve gotta be stellar at maintaining those connections.

They can’t off-set their deficiencies with sex.

Boyfriends can.

But take away that magic maker and they’d never meet the minimum threshold for friendship.

That’s why boyfriends will never ever be friends after a breakup. They aren’t worthy of the title.

Also there’s that pesky problem of backsliding. No matter how much you think you’re over each other, inevitably one of you will backslide.

Then you’re in a mudslide of emotional muckiness.

Either way a rollicking disappointment.

Better to cut the cord and move forward.

 

 

 

 

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28 Responses to We Will Never Ever Be Friends After A Breakup

  1. winsomebella says:

    And what to do about ex-husbands?

  2. Try and convince a teenager of this. ( or anything….)

  3. zelmare says:

    I totally, completely, agree with you.

  4. Definitely. It’s hard to lose someone you care about. But once that relationship is severed, a new one can’t transplanted.

  5. Carrie Rubin says:

    I think it would be tricky to maintain friendship with an ex. If the couple has kids together, then they should indeed learn to be cordial to each other, but if no kids are involved, it might be best to sever the tie completely. But what do I know? I’ve been married since I was two. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  6. Samir says:

    A most interesting use of logical deduction ๐Ÿ˜‰

  7. jmmcdowell says:

    I suppose there could be exceptions, but I don’t keep in contact with any ex-boyfriends. I’m not sure it was a conscious decision, but it’s the way things worked out.

    • Agreed. Everyone is different and has to do what works for them. For me friend is a term applied to deep meaningful emotional connections. Boyfriend doesn’t necessary reach friend and surpass it. ๐Ÿ™‚
      Sometimes things work out for the best. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  8. With you 100 percent, Kourtney. Going from intimate partners to broken up to friends isn’t a natural or healthy progression, IMO. There may be exceptions, but I’m certainly not one of them. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    • Thanks August. ๐Ÿ™‚ It just feels like a forced method of keeping someone connected when the connection was severed. I am happy for the exceptions if it works for them. I’m not one of those people either. Though I did try it once so I can say been there done that. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  9. EllaDee says:

    I agree, once you break up with them, so long as there’s no kids involved, they’re as good as dead, especially if they’re the break upperer – in my experience they only want to be friends so they don’t feel so bad/guilty. One of my favourite all time quotes (& I have a few) is Tupac Shakur’s โ€œYou can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve, would’ve happened… or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the f^ck on.โ€

    • Awesome quote! Definitely words to live by. ๐Ÿ™‚ And I agree, they are systematically removed from my existence so that I can move forward. If they couldn’t cut it as a boyfriend, they sure won’t be a decent friend.

  10. First of all i LOVE Taylor! And yes I agree – I’m not friends with any exes. There’s a reason they are an ex!

  11. Elliot says:

    I’m not one to stay good friends with ex’s unless there is a reason to. I’ve lots one or two good friends through break ups and others were no big deal. But then without these, I would not have my wife and son now, so in the grand scheme of things, it was worth it.

  12. 4amWriter says:

    I think you’re probably right, unfortunately. I did try to maintain friendships with ex-boyfriends and they always ruined it by wanting to resume the relationship. Sometimes I wonder if more time would help, but then I think no, I’d rather cultivate friendships that don’t carry all that baggage.

    • I’ve always kept the friends and the boyfriends in separate arenas. I don’t think anyone should maneuver between them. Not that it can’t happen or that it couldn’t work for others, just not for me. I tried to be friends with an ex but each of us always wanted more at some point and it hurt so much more to say goodbye the second time.

  13. berry says:

    You cam never go back. It’s never ever the same.

What do you think?