I’ve been doing so much thinking lately. And despite all the job turmoil and uncertainty about my future, I feel tremendously grounded. Why? I’ve got amazing pillars supporting my world.
My parents love me more than I can begin to understand. They are always there to comfort, to console, and to celebrate.
One of my oldest friends and I finally got together and smoothed things out tonight. I’ve had that connection since I was 11 years old. For many years, he was my rock. As often happens in life, we had a falling out. But tonight, we just talked and enjoyed each other’s company. We spent quality time together. And I realized all the hurt feelings, all the sadness–they were a colossal waste of time. Because the pure joy of sitting with him, seeing him right there in front of me. Laughing together. Shit that is what makes my life meaningful. I am so very happy my heart could burst. We are finally back. I don’t know if he realized how much strength I drew from him or how much it bothered me. I think the passionate fights show how much we truly care for each other. But I’m going to work to control my temper or at least not be so stubborn.
Then there’s B, who has been by my side since college. Sometimes it feels like us vs. the world. He gets my travel anxiety. I get his work stress. We can make each other laugh until we almost pee our pants. We have become hermits at times–but together. He loves my dog like his own. That takes a special person.
L is my girl. One of my few female friends. LOL. Not sure how we first clicked, might have involved lots of drinks and SOX jokes. But we clicked and lived in different countries but stayed in touch. She’s great and there to hold my hand when I need it.
Then there is Z who puts up with my crying fits, my dirty jokes, my reediculous stories. And listens and supports me.
Last, but not least–OL. He gives me such unconditional love and support. He holds my hand when I’m upset, and knows when to call me on my shit. And he’s coming to visit. Can’t wait for in person time. we spend the majority of our time on skype of the phone. But he’s there.
I don’t think I could have gotten through my life without these amazing people. And no matter what happens, I feel absolutely blessed to love them and be loved by them. I think they are the reason I’m not afraid of the future. Of trying and failing. Because I know they will be there to see me through it.
I love you all. Just in case I don’t say it enough. I wanted to say it here. And to thank you for making my life so fantastic.